Xander turns 1yo today! I am a proud mummy who survived exclusively drinking breast milk. Ross said that he is much stronger physically that all the kids she had looked after

He is such a cheerful baby that everyone loves him

This gift from Gail

Had dinner at this useless place in Eco Botanic, not sure how long this shop can last

After hair cut, took xander to take this passport photo. Handsome young man! This is in preparation for applying long term visit pass

Xander thrives for independence and love this walker! He will push this and walk around the house. He will even push the hand away if ppl trying to help him

He is about 9.4kg and 76cm? Today he used his hand to pick the food and eat. He wants to eat whatever I m eating and doesn’t want to eat baby food anymore. He has 7 teeth and the 8th one coming out too! My baby is really no longer a baby anymore

My classmates’s father yummy 炒糕

初九拜天公

Xander yank \240a little at night due to fireworks

Xander likes to look at the 🐕

Will cling to me most of the time

So emotional after 20+ years

My classmates’s father yummy 炒糕

Xander has 8 teeth now. He can say “up” clearly cuz mum taught. Likes to hold one of my hand and walk around the garden, plug the leaves and taste it. Likes to fall backward and expect me to catch him. Likes to pick his food from the plate and self feed. Have been a super lovely and good boy

Though I really like xander’s exposure in HH, only way is that I stop working and take care of xander by myself. I really hated it when 我两头不到岸，工作也不能专心不开心，每天赶carpool 和安排车程。我快要垮了😞

Brought xander for vaccination MMR and then bring him to the library. There wasn’t much people and have temperature screening and identity tracking

Dad wasn’t happy that i went to the library without telling him in advance and deviate the timing.

I thought the library has good range of book and I don’t have to spend money given that I am very keen to resign soon. Moreover I was told not to spend too much money

Xander already can walk 5 to 10 steps without holding on at different surfaces

Xander offering me his toast!

Have finally made my decision to tender. A place where I have worked for 7 years, my first job! Definitely a emotional decision. But a good one to end my dilemma.

Pros:

1. Spending more quality time with xander as I can’t turn back time. Focusing on what matters to me most

2. Rest and recover from operation and preparing for next baby

3. Save my energy and time from liaising and travelling so I can do more important thing etc well-being of Gary, Xander and myself

4. For my mental and physical well being as there is no such thing as part time. Self care. 重新定位

5. Doesn’t want to bring coronavirus home if any

Cons:

1. Lesser income as a household ( Next time go back to full time, can always earn $ back)

2 . Losing my clinical skill (work as locum to upkeep)

Had 2 hours talk with Mdm Toh yesterday and I had different mindset about my situation. She encouraged me to study master. I will also look at things differently. Ultimately good to have own career as it might be hard on Gary to support the family. In case something happen. Initially thinking 🤔of doing real estate, probably more of investment than to become a real estate agent. She said 满街都是

She shared with me not to spend too much money on tuition as the child need time to digest and learn on their own. Discipline is the most important. She said I will need more time to coach the child when he goes primary Sch.

She urged me to self care and stop breastfeeding since baby is 14 month soon. \240I still have a long way to go. Need to take care of myself first

She pointed out that once I move back to Singapore, xander needs to adapt to new home and new Sch, plus I am working. It’s tough on xander! I need to work things out to mitigate that

Got a toy and water bottle for xander from Raihanah

Finally have a chance to bring xander for a walk and look at the doggies. He loves it! That’s the pros of not working. I get to see the moments when he moves with music

And walk without support

Finally have time to do water play with xander, he is so happy 😁

I found out that Gary bought a pair of heel so that he can masturbate. I was disappointed as it’s been 2yrs since our last time and he didn’t even communicate with me just assuming that i m tired from breastfeeding and that he has no mood. Assuming that I will get pregnant easily. I was disappointed that he didn’t communicate, didn’t care about how I feel and what I think. Honestly if this goes on we will go our separate way after 2 kids. He kept blaming its xander that resulted him having insufficient sleep when I told him I am the one looking after most of the time.

Thought this is a good reminder! For helper who don’t use microwave too

I almost forgot xander is 14 month old. He is walking around our room and house without support but unsteady. He loves upbeat music and will sway to the beat of the music! He will come to me or his grandma for cuddles. He loves sleeping in his big play yard which is much more safer! Xander has grow up so much and he has tried so many food, his favourite is green veggie and soup 🥣

He loves reading especially books with tractor 🚜 and wheels. He notices dog and lantern in his environment. Such a smart boy!

Last day of service on 26th March but I had to leave on 17th March due to Malaysia locking down its border on 18th March. We had to send xander to Singapore and back for the 30 days visa. On top of that I need to see patients, do handover, liaise with HR regarding my leave. Luckily I have already cleared most of my things few months back and had back up most of the staff from my email.

Will miss these ppl

Thank goodness for the lockdown, Gary is staying in for 2 weeks. We never had so much together and he never had so much sleep 😴 I totally love it that he is spending more time with Xander!

Keeping this as reference:

Carpooling 🚘

James

Date:

Time: 8:25am

Location: Yijia to JCH

Car plate: JMS8580 Livina

Karen

Date: 12th March Thurs

Time: 810am

Location: Yijia to JCH

Car plate: JSS 8664 Blue Black Starex

Florence’s Dad

Date: 16th March, Monday

Time: 8:15am

Location: Yijia Bukit indah to JCH

Car plate: JRL 9593

Yuki Lau

Date: 25 Oct (Friday)

Time: 7:55am

Location: Anjung to JCH bus stop

Car plate: JSY9797

Cost: $10/pax

JS

Date:

Time: 8:30am

Location: Anjung to Bugis

Car plate: 9307 white Starex

Return trip

MV Toh

Date: 17th March (Tuesday)

Time: 4:45pm

Location: JCH to HH

Car plate: SLZ8182B. Green Jaguar

Cost: $10/pax

Albee Tan

Date: 19,20th Feb (Wed, Thurs)

Time: 5pm

Location: Tiong Bahru MRT to Yijia

Car plate: BRV JSB9913

Cost: $9/pax

Jf Lew

Date: 16 Dec, Monday

Time: 6pm

Location: Tanjong Pagar to HH

Car plate: SGG2539

Cost: $8/pax

Ivy/Sky

Date: 20th to 22th Aug (Tuesday)

Time: 4:45pm

Location: Boon Lay MRT to Yijia

Car plate: JTE 4996

Cost: $9/pax

9839 9976 Neo

Villa

Date: 25th Oct

Time: 1:30pm

Location: JE MRT to Anjung

Car plate: JRE8906 Silver Starex

Cost: $10/pax

Finally had the opportunity to go walking/running in the park. That’s possible because we are both not working. I think that’s what life should be about

Xander is a big boy now. He says “more” when he wants more

Xander enjoys the steam egg I cooked for him today. He finished it and that’s the 满足感 I had as a stay at home mum 🥰

Even Ross and Gary was impressed with my cooking 💪🏻

Brought xander for a walk. Saw this rainbow 🌈 and I was so excited!

Am glad that Gary is working from home from today onward. So we don’t have to bother about his SHN in Singapore or transport issue. Most importantly we can be together. Only thing is that I don’t have me time at all until Xander sleep. Gary helps to look after xander more now but he doesn’t shower, feed or change his diaper. Only keen to cook his meal.

First time seeing star fruits tree. The fruits camouflage very well

Dad’s kunic ginger

Took 6-8 months to harvest

The monkey 🐒 is keeping us busy. He ate our neighbours banana

I realised I can see legoland from my room- after staying here for one year!

This cute little xander has 11 teeth now, 4 more coming the way

He is so adorable imitating me nodding his head. He can say a lot of words like: bear, cold, hot, mummy, papa, there, 鹅，这个

Mum saw this monkey at her door at second floor and dad managed to chase him into futon’s room toilet. He poop and pee everywhere. It still managed to escape through the toilet window

Xander grow up fast! He can express himself better. Poor boy got stung by insect as he didn’t apply insect repellent before coming down

Miss these Ondeh x2 😋

Got these replay cutlery for Xander, it’s lightweight, easy to wash and attractive for children to eat. Thumbs up 👍🏻

Gary enjoying his BBQ

Nice and breezy

Chance upon this book in dad’s cupboard. Good read

Rosanna helping with Gary’s cooking. We are stucked with her. Can’t replace her as it’s more than 3 months. It’s Covid now and tiring to run around having to pay RM15k for another new maid

Xander loves to pull the stroller along

He can understand most of the things I said now

Covid 19

Trying out the new pool bought from Toyrus RM220. Pump cost RM100. Looking for a slide for him too

Xander enjoying his orange 🍊

His favourite activity is now playing with water and swing

Using step 2 as boat. Good to introduce water play as he was fearful initially

Checky boy using cover to cover his face so

Ross can’t feed him

Playing peek a boo

Love water play with his daddy

He can eat orange from the skin

Love to water the plants with watering can

He will raise his hand to indicate that he is a good boy

These ppl came from Pontian and took about 1hour to arrive

They injected the monkey before putting it into the cage

Initially I felt that we are a bit cruel to do that to the monkey. But thinking back if we don’t do that that monkey might harm xander.

Xande even stepped on the shit 😱 accidentally

He enjoys sitting on the couch to watch his TV/ nursery rhymes

Xander is more confident with water play now. He loves the boat Gary bought for him. Love the time we spent together 🥰

He enjoys eating orange from the skin and likes to make ppl around him laugh 😂

In addition, I need to paste my passport picture at the bottom of the page, which is also not indicated.

We also need to make a trip to LHDN to get a chop on the stamp which we purchase from post office RM10 ( security bond)

First I need to key in the details on this computer before getting a queue number. I freak out when everything is in Malay. Luckily there is a button to click and the form will be in English. The format was hard to read and navigate around, however it was a simple one.

Their lunch break is from 1-2pm and so we went to get our lunch at drive through MacDonald

After lunch, we were caught in heavy rain and was drenched waist down. The application process went smoothly and both were given special pass to stay in Malaysia till 5th Aug 2020. When I enquire about getting Malaysian PR for xander, I need to go to JPN block 2 to get a letter saying that xander will never become a Malaysian then I can apply for Malaysia PR.

We need to wait for 2-3 months for the long term visit pass to be processed. RM90 (via debit card) and additional RM200 cash from Gary upon collection. First application usually valid for 6 months and 1 year for subsequent renewal for adult. On other hand, I need to renew every 6 months for xander! That doesn’t mean their passport won’t be stamp, Gary has to apply for Mac if he doesn’t want his passport to be stamped. It’s so hard to get Malaysia PR for both of them. Xander needs to get a student pass from 7yo onwards and can only start applying for PR from 16yo onwards.

Yummy Tonkutsu lunch set!

Salmon belly and Hotate sashimi, these just arrived today and they were unboxing when we order it. The hotate cost Rm68 and had after taste 😋

Dating without Xander

It was a nice lunch. Thereafter I head to Sam’s place to cut and dye hair. After 6 months! I felt much younger and refresh :)

Went ikea to buy xander and household stuff as it’s unlikely that we will visit ikea anytime this year!

Gary spending more time with xander before his departure to Singapore in 2 days time

Last day before Gary goes back to Singapore and don’t know when I will see him again. Today he brought xander for a car ride, brought him to the playground even though xander is tired and sleeping

Make pasta sauce for me as back up plan and played with xander more before he goes to bed. He cried and I cried too, cuz he is gonna miss little xander. Human are like that, taking things/ each other company for granted until you loose it.

Gary went back to Singapore today. We cried again when saying goodbye. The first time I saw him cry was when I want to break up with him, the second time was during our wedding and now the third time when we bid goodbye today.

I know Gary misses xander a lot

You can see tears in his eyes 😢 really missed him, without him no one will make breakfast for me, help me out with xander, drive me everywhere and help me run errands.

Xander finally putting on his hat

A big boy now

Loves to eat sweet corn like me 😄

Xander sitting like a big boss 😂

A big boy now. Knows how to clean his car 👍🏻

My birthday celebration is just a simple one. Without Gary this time. Gary’s mum and dad is so sweet to buy a cake for me 😊

He is trying to climb the tree

A lot of expression!

His eyes just melt my heart 💓

He loves to see the banana tree

Grandpa showing him how to use the drill. He was fearful initially

Trying to toilet train him

He loves to sit there to tap his feet

He loves eating corn 🌽

His dinner last night

Big boy now can sit and read a book at the table.

Conversation with xander this afternoon:

Me: lets go down for snacks

Xander: Corn (excitedly)

Me: why do you have to eat corn everyday, are you a chicken?

Xander: No

This is the type of happiness and smile you get when you spend quality time with him 😊

Xander’s new hair cut by grandpa! Looks handsome and fresh :)

He is such a sweet boy. When I asked he if love me, he will give me a kiss on my cheek 🥰😍

The only thing which upset me was xander fell yesterday at the back of his head as Ross was going to shower him. She said she didn’t see him pee near the gate. That means she leave him out of sight, negligence 😡🤬

He is interested with mask and don’t mind wearing it now

He knows how to depress the pump and spray

He is interested with mask and don’t mind wearing it now

Xande is really happy and excited for the trip to Kempas

He is more keen to sit in the car seat after Kempas trip too

Tangkak beef noodle

Visited happy bee farm which is 5 mins drive from kempas apartment while mum and dad went to renew Ross visa.

I think the adult enjoys this trip more than the kid

Xande loves eating Rambutan

Being able to see live chicken in the market is so precious

Dad drove us to this stream in KL. It’s just like how I grow up playing in the stream and exploring the nature. Really appreciate that.

Xander enjoys playing in the water and playing stone. I haven’t laugh so hard in a while

Dug this out when looking for popo’s photo. Look a lot like Xander!

https://drive.google.com/drive/folders/1PdVMcwLYClZdms4vnFaVQe_xht7nJxXc?usp=sharing

Popo‘a passing reminds me again what is 生不带来，死不带去。ultimately when you pass on, only the family members are there to take good care of you and send you off your last journey. Mum had to rushed back to Singapore and popo waited to hear all her children voice before passing away at 2am in the morning in her sleep.

Didn’t realised its so high tech nowadays that we can watch the cremation live on line! It’s a pain sending her off even though I don’t know her well. She believes in the kids must eat well before they can study well, ensuring the kids go into good Sch has impacted mum and her grandchildren. Her sacrifices has paid off as all her kids and grandchildren are doing well!

Xander and his favourite playmate Jojo

Xander haircut by Grandpa today

Though there were some holes. But lots of 💓

I hope xander look back at this photos and appreciate his grandparents more in the future

Attempted mixed fruits with yogurt but he didn’t like it. Need to try a few more times

Being able to look after xander full time is really a blessing. He really love drumstick and chewing the bones

He is so love love that he will kiss me and not let go 😊

Gary is so stressed with work. He needs xander to de stress him.

Glad that Yan Ling came over. Haven’t seen her for at least a year?

Mum cooked and brought this ginger bee hon for me

We also go 红肉蕉 from 四舅。Probably won’t get this if I were to stay in Singapore

Can’t believe that he can line the stone in straight line. And he could do that when he is much younger.

Try making the popsicle and it’s super fun

Xander loves the coconut 🥥 popsicle as it tasted sweet. He kept asking for more 😋

Harvested the pepper corn and love digging the soil. Sensory stimulation

Though he doesn’t like the soil on his hand, he continue digging cuz he loves the excavator

Xander love the cupcake from Noah’s first bday

He should be the ambassador of the cupcake 🧁

X exploring the park and playground

Xander helping with the Dill

Teaching x how to wash his own dishes

Ross initiative to make Japanese food

He is a smart boy! He will hug his soft toy and fall with it on his face so that he don’t sustain and injury!

When I promted him not to sit in w position, he knows what’s the right way of sitting 👍🏻

He is tall enough to reach for items on the table and the door knob to open my toilet door!

He can say “open the door” “ see you in the morning” and becoming more talkative now.

He loves to eat kang kong! He is kang kong king 👑

Love his charming smile

Now he knows the word Fai De. He said go Fai De 🤣

New haircut by grandpa 👴🏻

Enjoying his broccoli 🥦

Our dinner

Red snapper was super fresh. Ross said she cooked 6mins on one side and 3 mins on other side

He is more talkative now. When Ross asked him to drink the um from the porridge, He said long arm boom which sounds the same!

When you teach him words, he will copy your “hmm” which makes it sounds funny 😂

When he drinks water, he will say muscle thinking that his muscle is growing 😅

X’s lunch

Tips from Ross, do not squeeze the water out of Bonito shaving. Use sieve and kombu water to rinse the bonito shaving

How lucky am I to win RM200 voucher. Actually only 13 pax participated

X loves to wash his car and playing with water

He likes to pretend that he is a fireman 👨‍🚒

Water colour from ikea

2020 it’s a funny year

- a year that I have to stay home most of the time due to Covid

- Many people losing their jobs and depressed due to separation

- get to spend time with x and Gary (March - Mid July)

- left \240my work

Wish for 2021

- get my house

- have a baby

- spend more time with my love one

He can say so many words now, delicious, amazing, bougainvillea etc... when he says mushroom while eating it, he will say dance room which rhymes 👏🏻 that’s the power of reading to him daily since young!

Flower blossom

Walking around the neighbourhood

Glad to be able to spend quality time with him, taking lots of pictures before he grows up

Roaming around the neighbourhood

Showing off his new socks