This whole area is part of the Colorado Plateau uplift and has some pretty fascinating geology. \240

Sipupu Bridge

My ankles were sore and my calves were cramping up. \240As usual. \240Why should anything be different just because I’m out here? \240On a good note, I had the whole place to myself. \240It was so peaceful to be wandering around the cliffs and canyons without anyone else nearby. \240The sun had come out and formed shadows on the canyon walls. I drove in to see Kachina Arch and Horsecollar ruins. \240I didn’t have time to to hike down to them but saw them from the lookout areas.

Horsecollar ruins (look closely!)

I was getting pretty hungry so I parked at the Kachina Bridge overlook area to make dinner and enjoy the fading light over the canyon. \240By the time I was eating a piece my birthday cake that I brought, I got to see an amazing sight. \240A huge full moon was creeping up over a cloud just over the canyon. \240It was breathtaking to witness this in such a sacred spot. \240I watched it rise higher, a glowing orb, and kept an eye on it it as it appeared to get smaller. \240

Time to head back to camp. \240It seems like it had cleared off for the night but I bet it will be in the 30s tonight. \240I’m glad I brought ear plugs because I hate having to listen to RV generators all night long. \240Seriously what are they doing in there? \240Watching baseball? \240Tomorrow I will leave from Kane Gulch ranger station and enter Grand Gulch!

Trail down to Sipupu Bridge

Cross-bedded petrified dunes

Base camp at Natural Bridges campground

Oh my that tent looks awfully small for 2 people. \240Why yes it does. \240If you don’t know me very well (few people do because of my social anxieties). \240 I nearly always backpack solo. \240Huh? \240Why in God’s name would I do that? Well first off, \240I don’t know too many people who do this sort of thing. \240Secondly, I don’t have to worry about what anyone thinks about me. \240“Wow, why’d she do that? \240That was really stupid.” No one sees my dumb decisions and believe me I’ve made them. \240How about that time at the base of Truches Peak when I drank unfiltered alpine lake water? \240I was so sick It was difficult to hike out. \240After that little incident I had bowel issues for 3 months. It was also on that trek that I didn’t research how to ascent Truchas peak and nearly fell on skree. \240Dangerous and stupid. \240 I really try not to do stuff like that and that was my worst trek. \240Thirdly, I like being alone. \240Yes it’s lonely, but I feel like I’ve got total freedom out here. \240I can stop if I want, take a nap, hike on, sleep late, you name it. \240No one can tell me not to. \240I must say though that some of my most fun experiences have been backpacking with Troop 100 on Maui and Troop 285 from Albuquerque. \240It’s true that no woman is an island so yes, I do get lonely and feel like I have no friends. \240People do make a difference.

I took some time at the visitor center and then made my way to Kane Gulch Ranger station. \240By the time I hit the trail it was noon.

I was excited. \240The trail was well marked as I went deeper into Kane Gulch. \240The rocks began to tower above me. There was flowing water in the stream and there were places I could have swam. \240I didn’t swim. \240Number one your not allowed to and number two it was cold. \240I still had on my light down jacket. \240

Rock crevis with conchoidal fracturing.

My pack didn’t feel too awful accept for the pack itself digging me in my upper back. \240Ultralight packs aren’t the most comfortable. \240I stopped at the junction between Kane and Grand gulch. \240I had some lunch and then looked at my Gaia app. \240Where were all the way points I plugged in?? Not there. \240They must have gotten lost when I updated the app. \240I had them in my inReach app and found I was close to a ruin. Good thing I can at least see that because I forgot to download my topo for the inReach. \240Ugh. \240I ditched my pack to explore. \240I knew I was getting closer to the ruins \240because I began to see potsherds everywhere. \240I looked up and saw some structures tucked neatly away in a seem of the cliff. \240No way anyone could get up there! I could still see remnants of a ladder. \240Wow! \240It took my breath away! \240A trail lead me to the lower ruins. Welcome to Junction Ruin!

The earliest inhabitants of this area were the early Basketmakers who lived there around 500 BC to AD 750. \240They derived from hunters and gatherers. \240Eventually these nomadic folks learned to cultivate corn and then, guess what? \240They had time to make beautiful woven baskets and pottery. Originally their dwellings consisted of shallow pits. \240Next they built up walls, covered them with mud and used sticks and logs to create the roof. \240They also made amazing grain storage structures that were essentially sealed tight to keep critters from munching away on their crop and keep it fresh from the weather. \240Time wore on and the climate became drier. Drought hit the region and by the 1200s they migrated away from the area. The Basketmakers eventually became the Puebloan people, hence the name “Ancestral Puebloan ruins”. \240The majority of the ruins in Grand Gulch are from this time period, although there is evidence that Archaic peoples also moved through this area and their timeline is 6000-2000 BC!

I was super excited. \240The only way to get to these ruins is on foot or pack animal. \240 I tried to take everything in. \240There were grinding stones (metate) laid out and hundreds of pieces of pottery. There were dozens of ancient corn cobs scattered about and pictographs of hands were on the wall behind the structures. \240There were 3 kivas too. \240I made sure not to touch anything or go inside the buildings in this sacred place of the ancients.

Structure high in the cliff seam

Potsherds

I thought about how lucky I was to experience this living outdoor museum. \240I lingered a bit too long. \240The day was wearing on and I had a ways to go to get to Todie Canyon junction. \240

Metate

Kiva

Pictographs

Grain storage structure

I moved on. \240The trail disappeared entirely now leaving me to bushwhack or deal with sand in the gulch. \240I came to another incredible ruin but it was roped off. \240Farther along brought me to yet another. \240The upper structures were sky high in the cliff. \240The ground floor was impressive but looked like it had collapsed on itself. \240There was a wall of petroglyphs there.

Petroglyphs

What an amazing place! \240Time got away from me. \240It was nearing 5 and I was no where near Todie, my camp for the night. \240On and on I hiked in the dry stream bed that was more or less a trench. \240Finally I reached Todie canyon and some clear pools for water! \2408 miles. \240I was so glad to be done. Back hurts, ankles hurt, left hip screaming. \240I still had plenty of work to do at camp. \240It was getting dark by 8 so I laid my aching body down for the night.

Birthday!

I miss my hammock. \240It’s far better for my back and I don’t have to scramble on the ground groaning because stuff hurts. However in a tent you can put your things wherever you like and don’t have to worry about everything falling in the dirt. \240Sometimes I envy people who get to camp on grass.

I heard the squeaking of a falcon or hawk somewhere nearby. \240I’m guessing it’s claimed territory here because I heard it last night too. \240It’s been cold and I’m glad I brought 2 jackets and my quilt as a sleeping bag liner. \240That with a hot water bottle made for a warm night. GC

The sun has breached the gap in Todie Canyon. \240I wish it would warm my back but it’s not coming where I am any time soon.

Todie Canyon

I have a journey today to reach Bullet Canyon junction. \240Let me tell you hiking here is not easy. \240There are no trails other than where others have tried to walk. \240Yesterday I got stuck in a field of Russian thistle and had to backtrack. \240Lots of bushwhacking unless you want to walk in a sandy trench of a gully and then you can’t see much. \240Good thing no flash floods are in the forecast. \240Do not, I repeat do not come here during monsoon season!!

I left my camp and went back to the gulch. \240I hoped it wouldn’t be a whole day of this. \240The trench became narrower and the walls steep. \240I had to get out of there. \240I backtracked and found my way up and meandered through the brush. \240Soon things opened up to a real trail and finally the sun came out!

I found another ruin but it was roped off due to erosion. \240Back to the trench and out the other side. \240I stopped briefly at Pour-over Pool but it wasn’t flowing. \240On I trekked trying to follow footsteps of someone who came before me. \240Then I saw an amazing structure high up in the seam of the sandstone! I believe this one is called Lion Track Ruin. \240Even before they made a ladder they had to get up there. \240Yikes. \240I knew enough by now that there was probably a lower level. \240Sure enough there was! \240Time to dry out my damp sleeping bag and grab some lunch. \240The temperature dropped and the sun disappeared. \240Snow began to fall but I was protected by the natural alcove. I was the only one there enjoying the ghosts of the past. \240I imagined a bustle of activity here hundreds of years ago. \240Women grinding corn, men sharpening their flint tools, and children chasing eachother around the alcove. \240They chose well. \240I was snug and dry as the snow continued to fall. \240

Pictographs

Snow falling at Lion Track Ruins

I’m glad I took the time here but I had to get going. \240It looked like a long way to Bullet Canyon and it was slow going. \240I thought I would finally get some speed, but I soon lost any semblance of a trail. \240More bushwhacking. \240I had no idea how to get back to the gulch. \240Time to backtrack. \240I finally picked up another deer trail and took that. \240On I hiked as my feet got more and more tired. I came to Split-level ruin next. \240I didn’t take too much time here but sure enjoyed the view!

I followed a trail for a short distance and then lost it entirely. \240I pushed through the brush accidentally crushing cryptobiotic soil. \240That is precious stuff as it takes forever to form and it helps prevent erosion. \240I grew frustrated. \240I knew where I needed to go but wound up cliffed out. \240I must have wandered aimlessly for nearly an hour. \240In the end I backtracked all the way back to Split-level ruin. \240It was a bummer but I did get to see a small mud structure that just happened to be in the rocks where I was. \240It was a storage structure for grain. \240I found a trail the lead me toward the gulch. \240Done with bushes. \240Time to hike the trench. \240I hiked through the damp mud and saw fresh mountain lion tracks. They could not have been more than a day old and probably more recent than that. \240Nice kitty! \240Please don’t eat me! \240I am not a deer! \240I started making all kinds of racket from talking out loud to singing. \240About 30 minute later I came across about 6 backpackers coming from the opposite direction. \240First people I’d seen since I left. Definitely made me feel calmer. \240Right after them I saw a family who passed me from ahead. \240They all seemed to be staying in the gully wash so I did too.

Beautiful structure

Sandy Grand Gulch trench

My body was really getting tired. \240Why is this pack so heavy? \240I stopped to look at the map. \240I wasn’t anywhere near Bullet Canyon. \240I realized that I needed to stop so I found a camp spot near Sheiks Canyon. \240Thank God there was some standing water in the gulch, otherwise I’d be hiking nearly a mile up Sheiks Canyon to get to Green Mask spring. \240Tomorrow I will hike the 1-2 miles to Bullet Canyon, set up camp and day hike to Jailhouse ruins. \240Tired and cold. \240Goodnight!

Sandstone cliff

My plan today is to find a camp spot at Bullet Canyon, set up camp and day-hike to Jailhouse ruins. \240I’ll have to lug water on the way back but it’ll be nice to not hike with a full pack the whole day. \240Why doesn’t it feel lighter yet???

It’s almost 9am and I’m still sitting here with the sun on my back. \240I chose a good camping site because the morning sun comes right through a notch in the canyon. Not a single cloud today. \240Although I dreamed of skiing last night, I’m fully invested in warmer weather while out here.

I left camp by 10 and started out toward Bullet Canyon. The trail was passable for the most part but then the salt cedar brush got thick and I was getting choked out. \240I turned around in hopes of a better way through. \240I looked up toward the rocks and saw a breathtaking view of what looked like a fortress. \240Wow! \240I heard voices in that direction but had no idea how to get there. The brush was impenetrable. \240Just as I was about to give up I found a steep climb up through the sand to get on top of the meadow closer to the ruin.

I didn’t climb the rock to get closer. \240I would have liked to but it looked pretty steep and I was fine where I was. \240I walked along the base of the rocks and was awarded with a wonderful view of the canyon. \240

I lingered a while but then saddled up to press on. \240I found a trail that followed the cliff bottom but it soon pinched out and I had to turn around. Back into the brush-choked valley. \240Sigh. The trail lead down a steep embankment and I fell on my butt with my ankle folded beneath me. \240I wasn’t hurt and crossed the stream to climb the steep trench wall on the other side. Other than bushwhacking, this has been by far the hardest part. \240You are constantly climbing down 10 foot embankments and scrambling up the other side of these arroyo trenches. \240Back in the brush I picked my way through and clunk! \240I whacked my head on a tree. \240As if my head didn’t hurt enough today. On I went. \240The stream channel opened up. \240I must be getting close to the confluence of Bullet Canyon. Yes! \240I found a nice spot and set up my camp. \240My head was throbbing but I had some Ibuprofen. \240I hoped it wasn’t going to turn into a migraine. \240I hung my bear line. \240What a pain in the you-know-where. It ALWAYS gets stuck in the tree. \240This time I had to climb up the cottonwood to get free it. Yesterday it was caught on a branch so I yanked it down and left my food bag on the ground. \240The day before it took a very long stick to pry it loose. \240The trees have a ton of branches rendering bear hangs nearly impossible.

I sat in the sunshine eating my lunch and hoping my headache would abate. \240I hung my food bag and put minimal stuff in my pack. \240Yay! For the rest of today’s hike I’d \240be lugging about 10 pounds. \240That’s way better than 30.

Aahhh! \240Bullet Canyon was a dream hike! \240A real trail that was easy to follow. \240The views were stunning. \240Towering rocks abound looking like giant Jabba the Huts ruling over the canyon.

Bullet Canyon

I stopped and scrambled up the rocks to explore some granaries. \240Granaries are different than dwellings. There are no soot marks on the ceilings and they appear wedged in the rock seams looking like a jack-o-lantern with its teeth knocked out. \240Up close they resemble neat little beehives. \240They are often sealed into the surrounding rock with mud access doorways. \240This helped keep their corn and other agricultural crops dry and critter free.

I pressed on. \240I could see evidence of several more granaries tucked high in the cliffs. \240They peered at me; black eyes from afar. \240Soon the trail became many trails. \240I wasn’t sure where to go to find the Jailhouse ruin. Most brought me to a camp but one lead me past a cave that was clearly used by \240inhabitants of centuries past. I checked my map. I was nearly upon it so where was it? \240I climbed higher and then looked up. \240Oh my. \240Wow. \240There were 2 huge moon-like orbs painted above the upper story ruin. \240The lower story had dwellings and probably a structure used for storage. There are still sticks cross-hatched \240imbedded into the mud window, hence the name Jailhouse.

Jailhouse Ruin

I climbed up to take a closer look but was sure not to enter any of the structures or touch anything. \240

What do the large, orb-like pictographic hs mean? \240According to the information provided they may indicate the moon. \240What a fascinating place. \240I could almost here the whispered of the past showing me the way of life in this mystical place.

Now it was time to find the Kiva that was supposedly in the next alcove. \240I followed a trail across the rocks and over to the next drainage valley. \240I looked for an alcove. \240There was one way up high but I couldn’t tell is anything was there. \240I followed footsteps that lead me higher. \240The final climb was a short scramble up sandstone. \240There it was! A kiva, a perfectly rectangular dwelling, \240and a storage structure! \240 I lingered there quite a while. \240I climbed down into the kiva (I read that you could).

Structure behind the kiva

Near the storage structure there was a boulder with several sanded gouges that were used to grind corn. \240

Metate

Beautiful spot! \240Now it was time to head back to my camp. \240The sun disappeared and it clouded up. \240Glad I brought my jacket. I made it back and began collecting water to filter. \240It was a clear pool nearby but it was stagnant and smelled. There were bits of what looked like oil on top that was likely from decayed plants. \240Well…it was a water source. \240Gotta trust the filter. \240I ate a hurried dinner so I could take an evening walk up near the granaries I can see lodged in the cliff not far from here. \240I found a way up through the ancient sand dunes that were more like a 1960s Star Trek set on an ancient faraway planet. \240Were there Salt monsters \240here? \240I climbed higher and higher cross-crossing my way through the steepening terrain. \240The sandstone soon became steepened to an uncomfortable angle and fear took over. \240I went back down. \240I think there was a place I could have gotten up as I saw someone else do it, but it was starting to get dark. \240The mosquitoes are out tonight. \240How can that be? \240It’s cold!

Really? \240A trail?

Tough going this morning. \240I had only done 3 miles and was already grumpy. The hiking consisted of \240following \240faint trails through brush and over fallen trees followed by negotiating the steep walled descents and ascents of the gulch. \240Sometimes the trail lead to a dead end in thick salt cedar. \240Other times I had to walk the tan highway in the gulch trench through miles of sand.

Steep, muddy embankments galore!

Now I’m REALLY bummed I don’t have a ride back to the ranger station. \240Nope, tomorrow I’ll be turning around and stomping through the thicket all over again.

It’s a wash

I went 5 miles and got sick of hiking through brush or the trench. \240I couldn’t see anything. \240There was no water. No ruins to enjoy. \240The canyon here was so narrow I had no choice but to hike in the sandy gulch. \240Trees and shrubs choked off everywhere else and then beyond that was impenetrable rock. There was no place to camp. \240I stopped at the Step Canyon confluence. \240The ranger station posted that there was water 20 minutes up from Grand Gulch. I am assuming they mean Step Canyon Spring. \240I have 1 liter left. \240According to my map it \240doesn’t look like things open up anytime soon. \240There could be camp spots near the spring. \240Do I want to take that chance? I don’t think so. \240I sat down in the dirt and ate my lunch. \240I dont like this area and don’t see it improving. \240It’s so narrow and close that I feel choked and claustrophobic. \240I \240have to turn around tomorrow anyway. \240Looks like I’m \240turning around now and headed back to Bullet. At least \240I did see a two-story ruin on my way here but it was too high to get near. \240There is supposedly a pictograph panel nearby called Quail Panel. \240I wish I could find it but the brush is so thick and the rocks so steep! \240I felt defeated and braced myself for the long hike back to Bullet Canyon.

After finishing my lunch (peanut butter and jelly crackers!), I decided to walk a little farther up Step Canyon. I went literally 5 minutes more and what’s that?? Water!!!! I was still about 1/4-1/2 mile from the spring but it had pooled in places. \240It had a thin coating of algae where it was more stagnant, but I found a place where it was flowing nicely above the surface. \240This might change things. I went back to my pack. \240I decided to explore to see if I could find a place to camp. Then I noticed a faint trail heading uphill toward the rocks. \240I’d been looking for Quail Panel. Maybe this will lead to it? \240Since I might be headed back to Bullet, I suppose I could take a few minutes to try to find it. The trail lead me closer to an alcove. \240Footprints. \240Yes, someone else was here. \240Then the view opened up. \240Wow! \240A huge alcove and a perfectly flat shelf where I could camp! I looked at the wall and it had a mural full of pictographs! \240Well what do you know! \240Some looked like quail! \240I asked if it would be okay for me to camp here, even though I felt weird about doing it. \240I didn’t get strange vibes, but it still felt like I was being watched or had entered someone else’s home. \240

Quail Panel

All thoughts of defeat evaporated. \240The sense of wonder and exploration took over in this remote, lonely place. \240There were what was obviously people, corn, deer, handprints, and a bunch of other things I couldn’t make out. \240Should I camp here? \240Other people obviously had. \240The alcove was north facing, cold and shaded. \240I guess that’s why no dwellings were built here. \240Suddenly the breath went out of me. \240There on the wall was an image of a red face. \240It’s eyes were huge and bulbous. The teeth were bared as if growling. \240 It looked like it was wearing ceremonial face paint, or it was evil. \240I decided not to camp in the alcove. \240Can you blame me? \240Would you camp near this??

Red-faced creepy pictograph

I decided to look elsewhere for camp. \240The nearby sandstone had some flat places. \240My tent isn’t free-standing but it didn’t look like rain. \240Cowboy camping for me!

I put down my gear and readied my pack to collect water. \240I must have spent an hour there filtering. \240I drank some right after and it was GOOD! I dumped the swamp water from yesterday and filtered 4 liters and carried back 2 more unfiltered liters. \240It’s hot near the rocks so a trail shower sounded great!

I set up my bed for the night. \240I added my gear and some rocks to hold me in place as there is a slight slope.

My bed!

That done, I secured everything else and took a walk up on the sand stone cliffs. \240I made sure to stay away from scary places. \240The view was incredible! \240Suddenly I felt the weight of loneliness. \240This section was very remote and seldom visited. \240I felt like the last human being deserted on \240an alien world with no way to return to earth. \240I’ve never felt so alone in my life. \240I wanted a huge eagle to swoop down and carry me off to civilization, far from this desolate place with its ancient secrets and angry faces. \240Relax…it’s okay. \240You’re fine. \240You’ve got water, food, and you’re not hurt. \240You’ve been respectful to the ancients. \240Nothing will hurt you. \240Okay. \240I’m good. Breathe.

Grand Gulch near Step Canyon

Next I visited the Quail Panel again. \240I was feeling pretty hungry so it was dinner time. \240Mountain House lasagna and chocolate! Tomorrow I have to start heading back toward the ranger station. \240I’m hoping to visit some ruins that I missed on the way out. \240It’s going to be a long day in the trenches tomorrow and I hope the Red-Faced Man stays in the alcove! \240

I hiked in the gulch as much as possible but there were places I had to climb out. \240Hiking in sand all morning was tiring. \240When I reached Bullet, I tossed my pack down and rested. \240I needed a break. \240Lunch was a bunch of crackers, \240cheese, and trail mix. \240I didn’t stay long as I was looking forward to getting to Sheiks Canyon to see the Green Mask Ruins and the spring. \240I hiked on, feeling somewhat rejuvenated. \240I reached the canyon entrance and hiked up Sheiks gulch. \240Wow! \240Sheiks canyon was lovely with scattered campsites abound! \240It didn’t take too long and I saw the ruins just ahead. \240I put down my pack to explore. \240The pictographs were amazing! \240The wall had both Archaic and Basketmaker \240era drawings. \240The Archaic ones might be as old as 2000 BC!!

Archaic pictographs

The Basketmaker mages looks so fresh it was like they were done yesterday.

Basketmaker era images

As I explored the site I noticed the spring right below the ruins. \240Fresh, clean water! \240There were a few people around. \240One group looked like they got a prime camp spot on \240the bluff across from the ruins. \240Maybe I should camp here too?

Ah lively, cool, clear water!!!

I took my time at the site. \240There were a lot of images to see! \240

Green mask at the right of picture

I had a liter of water left. \240I almost decided against filling up there, but the water was so clear. \240I filtered and filled up 2 liters of water.

It was a really tough decision to stay here or move on. Tomorrow I need to try to get near Todie Canyon, so I made the decision to move on farther up the canyon. \240The plan was to hike on and camp near Coyote Gulch so that I wouldn’t have as long of a day tomorrow. \240

What a HUGE mistake!!! I spent another few miles hiking through sand. \240I was tired, my feet hurt and I was just plain sick of hiking through sand and brush. I finally reached Coyote Gulch. \240Supposedly there is a spring up the canyon about 1/3 of a mile. \240I wasn’t enjoying Coyote very much. \240The brush on either side of the gulch was too thick for camping. \240I gave up trying to find the spring. \240I don’t know if it was dry or not. \240No water and no place to camp. That meant I needed to either press on, or backtrack to a place called The Thumb where I saw a spot in the sand. \240Lion Tracks spring area was too far away so I decided to backtrack a mile to The Thumb. I was angry and hurting. \240I’m so tired of this $&@!? Sand!!!! I yelled, kicked rocks, and was generally losing my mind. A mile isn’t very far right? \240No, but I’ve already done 9 sandy miles and gave up a great camp area at Sheiks. \240Oh why didn’t I stay there with the rest of the happy people?

I made it back to The Thumb. \240No water. \240Thank God I had the sense to fill up at Sheiks. \240I have 2 liters to get me through until I start seeing water near Lion Tracks.

The Thumb or Jabba the Hut’s Palace :)

After dinner I took a walk to see how close I could get to the ruins nearby. \240My feet were protesting but I wanted to see it. \240I climbed up the sandstone bluff. \240Wow those ruins are high! \240How did they get up there in the first place? \240There were no lower ruins to wander around so I went back to camp. \240The views up there were great!

An evening walk near The Thumb

I’ve been lazy with my bear hang kit. \240The trees around here just cause the rope to get stuck. \240I marched my food bag away from my tent and placed it on the ground. \240I need to get an Ursak. \240At least if a bear found my stuff it wouldn’t be able to claw into it. \240Tomorrow is going to be a long day. \240A few days ago Todie to Sheiks was 11 miles, but That’s probably because of backpacking and excursions right? By camping here I’ve cut out maybe a mile at most. \240I shut my eyes dreaming of water and grass.

ThevThumb

Last night Maui paid me a visit. \240We’ve been gone from Maui for nearly 6 years but I dream of it regularly. \240Usually my dreams don’t \240show me what things really look like there, Haleakala, Makawao Forest Reserve, or Kula, but I know it’s her. \240This time when she came to me I needed some sort of help. Something about a train ticket? \240(No trains on Maui but maybe I needed to get to Oahu?) I knocked on the door of a house that I think was maybe in Pukalani. \240I met a wonderful Philipino family who bent over backwards for me. \240They were so kind. \240They had an adult special needs son who loved to dance. \240They had a pet pig. The Aloha Spirit they showed me was incredible. \240At one point the mom held me as I cried saying, “Why did we leave? \240I can never go back!” \240I don’t remember much else. \240Maui. \240Do I really want to go back? \240How can that possibly be? \240We can’t afford it there and it’s far worse now then when we lived there. \240There’s no fall colors or skiing, so why? \240I think I’m chasing ghosts. \240Ghosts of the past when our son was young and goofy. \240Guilt from taking him away from the island just when he was coming of age. \240I’ve asked him about this and he says he’s glad we moved, but wants a chance to go “home” as an adult. He grew up there so yes, I guess it was his home, the place he put down roots. \240When I lived there I dreamed of New Mexico. \240It’s barren desert, red rocks, and endless landscapes haunted me when I felt trapped in a tropical depression. \240Right now I miss the ocean. \240Not so much swimming in it, but the color of the water, \240the jewel-like color of the blooming flowers. \240The Miyuzaki-like sky. \240Maui provided for us when we were there but I never trusted that those provisions would last. \240Sooner or later our rent would go sky-high and we’d be left to find a tiny 1-bedroom ohana somewhere, our 1200 square foot ohana given to someone richer. We just could never stake a claim in a house of our own. \240I stressed about so much when we were there and at times it nearly drove me crazy. \240So why am I sitting here with tears rolling down my dirty face? \240No idea. \240Wasn’t expecting this this morning.

I left the camp. \240I needed music today. I put in my earbuds and listened to Ori and the Blind Forest. I love video game and anime music so long as it has a great orchestral score. \240I hiked up the sandy wash and it soon turned to mud. \240There were mountain lion tracks in both directions. \240Please don’t eat me! \240You wouldn’t like all the plastic I’m carrying and I’m full of cholesterol! You don’t want to be full of microplastics do you?

How do I know these are cat tracks? \240Cats have retractable claws so you usually don’t see their impressions in the mud. They are wider than they are long and have a characteristic “M” pattern to the heel. \240These are about 2.5 inches in diameter.

Mountain lion tracks

Nice kitty!

I hiked on. \240Not long after that a 70-something man walked toward me from the opposite direction. \240He looked a bit confused. \240“Is this the way to the Ranger Station?” \240Oh my. \240He was over 12 miles away from the ranger station and stumbling in the opposite direction, with every step leading him deeper into Grand Gulch. He seemed pretty dazed. \240 His hands looked swollen, purple, and bruised but not cut up so badly that he needed medical attention. \240He wore a knit hat, long sleeves, and rain pants but only carried a small day pack. \240Wow! \240He’s really far away to be only carrying a day pack! \240He had no water and very little food. \240He carried no map and as far as I could tell no overnight provisions. \240Should I check his vitals? \240Maybe get some water and food into him and see how he is. I asked if he had water. \240He pointed to the stream saying, “Does this water have Giardia?” We sat down so that I could filter water. \240 He seemed to be a bit more coherent after fresh water and the snack I gave him. “My name is Danny. I’m hopelessly lost and spent the night out here. \240I only came out for a day hike yesterday. I was so excited about the ruins that I must have gone \240in the wrong direction. \240Then it started getting dark. \240I tried to sleep but couldn’t. \240I have a Mylar emergency blanket but it was cold. \240Next thing I knew the moon was up so I just started walking. \240I fell a few times but kept going, and here I am.” \240Holy smokes! \240This man could have died out here! \240What would have happened to him if he was off the beaten path in the brush? \240 When I told him he was 12 miles away from the entrance he was in disbelief. \240I \240told him I had been out for a week and was on my journey back to Kane Gulch ranger station.

“Do you have anyone at home who might be worried about you?”, I asked. \240“Nope.”, was his reply. He was worried because the permit from the ranger station on \240his van was now 2 days overdue. They’d know something went wrong. \240I told Danny I could contact my husband but that he was probably at work and maybe not get the message until evening. \240Danny said, \240“Well….I guess we can tell my wife. \240I hate to do it because she’ll just say I told you so!”

I \240texted his wife via the inReach to tell her he was okay and to please contact the ranger station to tell them we’d be hiking out tomorrow. \240My message had to be short and to the point. \240Communication with the inReach is a challenge in itself. \240If you are in a narrow canyon it can’t trasmit right away. \240The other person may respond but I might not receive that response for 40 minutes. \240You can only transmit 160 characters at a time. \240His wife Nid didn’t respond right away. \240I was forced to turn off the inReach due to a low battery. \240My jumper battery was in its last bar and \240I felt the need to save that to charge it up if we really got into trouble. \240I thought that by sending Nid the message that Danny was okay and had a guide was enough for now. \240What if he had health issues? \240What if he couldn’t make it out of here? \240I’d need every percentage of life in that Garmin device to press that sos button and then have a lengthy texting conversation with Search and Rescue. \240I had to save the battery.

We started hiking. \240It was tough going. \240Danny was slow and we barely made any progress after an hour or two of hiking. \240His hip was bothering him so I gave him some ibuprofen. We stopped for lunch and I made him eat a ProBar. \240Not long after he wanted to stop and rest. \240He began wandering off in the wrong direction. \240Did I do something to upset him? \240Why is is wandering farther away from me? \240“Hey! \240Where are you going?” I felt awkward saying it like that, as if he were a small child wandering away from his mother. \240“Oh….good thing I have you!”, he \240responded. \240Danny lay on \240his back in the grass, his painful hip causing him to grimace with discomfort as he wriggled out of his rain pants. \240What if he can’t go on? \240I eyed him with worry. \240Food. \240I’ve got enough to cover both of us through tomorrow but no extra. \240Water. \240We are good there. \240Shelter. \240I’ve got a solo tent but can rig up an A-frame with my small ground cloth and give him my quilt for added warmth.

We rested for 20 minutes or so and then pressed on. I got us turned around in one section and we had to backtrack. \240I’m starting to get even more nervous about my backup battery. \240It is running low and the solar panel isn’t much help due to the clouds. I was hoping to stop at some ruins that I saw on the way out but must have missed it. \240Danny told me he needed to take another rest. \240We stopped at some \240inaccessible ruins and Danny cast himself on the ground and fell asleep in an instant. \240I was worried he couldn’t go on. \240He was clearly beyond exhausted. \240I kept an eye on his breathing. \240I turned on my inReach and his wife Nid \240responded. \240She wanted to talk to Danny but I had to tell her that wouldn’t be possible with my emergency-only device. \240At least I knew she read my initial message. I am hoping we can make it another 1-2 miles to get to Todie Canyon so that I can get a hot meal into him and some sleep. \240I was worried but tried not to think about potential further issues. \240A half hour later I woke him to tell him we needed to press on.

Soon we came across 3 twenty-something trekkers headed for Bullet Canyon. \240“You do know about the weather moving in right?”, they said. \240It was a windy, chilly, cloud-filled day. \240I said, “When I left a week ago it said partially sunny and breezy after the first 3 days of my hike.” \240“Well we are expecting high wind with possible rain and snow moving in tonight.”, they told us. \240We small-talked for a while as we told them of Danny’s ordeal. \240They offered us food and a quick phone charge. \240I charged my phone up to 50 percent to get me through until nightfall. \240I should have charged it more. \240They told us one possibility we could do would be for us to hike out the 3 miles or so of Todie Canyon and then hike a mile and a half to the highway and hitch to the ranger station. \240Danny was very interested in this idea, especially with the weather moving in and minimal shelter. I wasn’t keen on it at all. \240Why? \240I knew the pace we were traveling. \240That would put us at the Todie confluence at about 5:30. \240I knew going up Todie would be a boulder-strewn, no trail nightmare and with with Danny’s hip, we’d never make it in the dark. \240I firmly said we’d go to the camp spot at Todie and spend the night there. \240Thankfully he agreed and didn’t press the issue.

On we hiked. \240Poor Danny hobbled along looking like a drunk homeless person. \240He didn’t talk much but pressed on as best he could. \240Please let us reach Todie. \240I didn’t know what to say to him to help. \240We need more water and I’ve got to get his shelter made. We were so close but nothing looked familiar. \240I was just here a few days ago! \240I was leading us up a meander that was incorrect. \240Backtracking again. \240Okay. \240Back to the gulch. \240Take that until we reach the confluence. \240Then make a right up that channel. \240Breathe. \240I fought back tears of stress and frustration. \240How am I going to get us through this? \240I’m just a foolish backpacker! \240Why me? \240Maybe someone else should have helped him! \240I can’t do this! All I could do was keep going. \240Danny followed me blindly. I waited for Danny every time I had to follow another quasi path. \240And then. \240Todie! \240Yes! \240There was the camp spot. \240The beautiful camp spot! “You know there’s rain moving in. \240Maybe we should consider Kane gulch? \240I know there are cairns to mark the way.”, Danny exclaimed. \240“Kane gulch is still about 5 miles from here. \240This is Todie and there are no trails. \240We need to stay here tonight.” \240Danny obliged.

We needed to find him as much of a sheltered location as possible. \240We found a spot tucked under juniper trees. \240I brought out my 4x6 foot ground cloth. I made quick work of a Siberian hitch and truckers hitch to make a taut ridgeline. \240I pitched the tarp low to the ground and tried to use knots on either end of the peaked top to hold it in place. \240Now for the corners. \240I cut my rope and tied 3 of the corners to nearby trees as close to the ground as possible. \240The fourth corner I used a stick in the sand as a stake and secured it with rocks. \240Next I used rocks to secure the sides of the shelter. \240He’d have to crawl to get under it, but it should keep him dry and cut down on wind exposure. Even with all that though it would be useless in a deluge with 50 mile per hour winds. \240If that happened \240I’d need to bring him into my single-person tent. \240With the shelter made I left Danny to shape the ground for a more comfortable sleep. \240Next I put up my tent. \240Time to filter water and then make dinner. \240I had 2 couscous meals as I was heading out a day early and had an extra.

Danny was now himself. \240We chatted during our meal. \240My food was terrible and Danny didn’t eat much of it. \240He told me he had tongue cancer that required radiation and surgery. \240Due to the surgery it severed some nerves to his stomach so he never feels hungry but has to make himself eat. \240Danny and his wife live in Texas. \240He told me his wife Nid is from Thailand and that they lived there for a while. \240One of his sons has been living in Bangkok for many years. \240He received his masters degree in anthropology and his daughter got her degree in speech pathology at University of Hawaii Manoa. \240She lived on the Big Island for years trying to build a home in the lava flow zone, the cheapest place in Hawaii to buy property. \240Man, this guy has had quite an interesting life! Danny asked what I did. \240Uh oh. \240Time to give him my non-detailed description I \240don’t want to argue answer. “I’m an environmental educator.” \240“You mean you teach about ecology and stuff? \240That’s great!”, he replied. \240He seemed safe. \240“Well…I actually teach climate change education.” \240I hesitate to tell people the real work I do l. \240I don’t want to get into politics or argue about global warming. \240I just don’t. \240If I sense that you think climate change is a bunch of bunk then you get my environmental educator answer. \240If I sense you are on board with making a positive change when it comes to climate issues then you get the behind the scenes answer. \240Danny cares deeply about climate change. \240His house is nearly off the grid and he finds his solar farm in his yard to be the most beautiful thing about his property next to his wife’s flowers. \240I was envious. \240My house is horribly addicted to expensive propane and my carbon footprint has never been higher. \240We can’t afford electric cars and the enormous sum it would take to convert to electric and then get solar on top of that. \240That being the case, youth climate education is my contribution for a positive future.

Danny grew tired. \240I gave him my quilt and surprised him with a hot Nalgene water bottle to help keep him warm. \240We went our separate ways to get through the night. \240I used the last of my jumper battery to charge the inReach to 70 percent and my phone to 70. \240If the phone dies I can still manually text on the inReach. \240It’s cumbersome but I could do it. \240Sleep remained elusive. \240All I could think about was packing up and getting us out. \240I wanted a shower and wanted to get Danny out of here.

Around 2am the wind picked up. \240Oh no. \240Here it comes. \240I could hear \240it gusting over the canyon. \240We got lucky. \240Really lucky. \240The wind didn’t batter us at all. \240You never know in a canyon. \240You may be protected or you could be directly in line of the Venturi Effect and feel like you’re stuck in a wind tunnel. \240The sky remained clear and the wind a harmless breeze.

Finally Kane Gulch! \240Cairns to mark the trail the entire way, and we only had 3-4 miles to go. Smooth sailing. \240Don’t you ever think that about the Grand Gulch wilderness area. \240Every time you do a mistake will be made and the gulch throws something else at you. \240It can be a maze of despair. \240 We followed the cairns up the canyon. \240Neck bent, head buried to deflect the falling snow, I only saw a cairn up to the right leading to a whole pile of steep, slippery boulders. \240There were other footprints there so I followed. \240They lead me over the first boulder. Snow was falling harder now. \240On I went with Danny struggling behind me. \240“I don’t remember this!” \240Wait! \240I think I found a way through! \240No. \240I was faced with more huge, truck-sized boulders. \240It was impassable no matter were I took us. \240“Danny, I don’t know how to get us out of this!”, I nervously exclaimed. \240What do I do, oh please get us out of here! \240The narrow canyon appeared blocked in every direction. Was I going crazy? I know I didn’t go through this on my way out. \240I just know it! \240I said a few choice words and felt my anxiety rise to the top. \240I fought back tears of rage. \240Stupid! \240I can’t do this! \240“Danny, I’m going to make my way back to the gulch where I went wrong. \240There just has to be another way around this!”, I yelled. \240He politely said, “Okay, good plan.” \240We met up back in the open part of Kane Gulch. \240I collected myself and had a look around. \240Ah no. \240You’ve got to be bleeding killing me. There on the other side was a cairn and a trail leading up the left side of the steep canyon up above all of the boulder-strewn chaos. Cairns can either help you, or lead you very, very wrong if you misinterpret them. \240We were back on track. \240The snow began to ease up. \240We were fortunate not to have any accumulation or ice to contend with. \240The trail was a challenging climb over rocks, but at least it was a trail. \240We were out of the woods! \240Safely on a well-marked trail! \240Umm no. \240In several places in the higher reaches I lead us astray yet again. \240It wasn’t nearly as bad though. \240I must have been tired, because my navigation skills today were terrible. \240Danny just politely followed. He told me about his time leading mentally ill patients on walks to get them outside. “You know, I really think the biggest reason they got that way was losing their confidence in themselves.” \240I felt like he was looking right through to my core. \240I have my own struggles with mental health at times \240I have zero self confidence. \240Never have. \240Depression and anxiety have been like 2 dark dementers strangling me my whole life. \240Always there waiting to pounce. Coming out of it has been my life’s struggles. \240I may have helped Danny with my rudimentary outdoor skills to keep him safe and get him home, but he told me in his gentle way that I needed to embrace confidence. \240I’ll try. \240I really will, but how can you change 50 long years of negativity toward yourself?

We were nearly to the top of Kane Gulch. \240Only a mile and a half to go. \240Our trail troubles were truly over now. \240We plodded along and I let the trail carry us home.

The sun shone \240brighter and burned away the dark, foreboding skies. \240We came to the green entrance gate and could hear the highway nearby. \240“Holy heck we made it!”, I yelled. Danny whooped with joy. \240We crossed the highway and went to the Ranger Station.

Two rangers were waiting for us to ask us questions. \240They said that Search and Rescue has almost been deployed and that a deputy was alerted to our plight. \240A SAR helicopter had nearly been launched but would not have been able to fly due to weather concerns last night. SAR finally received my message from \240that Danny was okay and that he was with me. \240They immediately cancelled the search. While Danny spoke with his wife on the phone., the ranger confessed to me that he feared Danny would have died down there if left on his own. \240He thought they’d be searching for a victim. \240Danny and I said our goodbye’s. \240The entire time we were traveling together he never complained or cursed. \240He always remained positive. \240We hugged and I think he teared up a bit. \240He told me how grateful he was that he met me and that he really thinks I saved his life. \240Maybe I did. \240Who knows?

I washed my hands with warm water and soap at the station, my introduction to becoming humanized again. \240Remember all of the home-life stresses I mentioned in the beginning? \240There are more I haven’t really mentioned. I’m going to be okay. \240Confidence. \240

Grand Gulch was harrowing. \240It’s bushwhacking, sand, endless rocks walls, paths leading to nowhere seem to represent life. Sometimes you get a clear path and all is right with the world. \240Just when you think you’ve got everything under control, you lose it. You’re faced with what seems like an impossible obstacle. \240You try. \240You fail. \240You have to go backwards in order to find your way forward. \240You cry, you hope, you try again. \240There were places in Grand Gulch where I felt like the only human in the world. \240It was down right terrifying. \240I have never felt so isolated in my life. \240The ancient ones were there and left their mark. \240“Look what we’ve done. \240Look what we’ve accomplished here. \240If we can make it, so can you.